


David's Alpacas

by FrizzleNox



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Alpacas, Conflict, David Rose Loves Patrick Brewer, Dialogue-Only, Farmer Patrick, Fluff, Future Fic, M/M, Patrick Brewer loves David Rose, Patrick Brewer loves spreadsheets, farm, post cannon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:42:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26114362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrizzleNox/pseuds/FrizzleNox
Summary: "David, you can't just adopt a pair of alpacas because you feel like it."David adopts a pair of alpacas, causing a rift with Patrick.They makeup and grow as a couple over the next five years.Dialogue only.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Comments: 19
Kudos: 51
Collections: Making Up After A Fight





	David's Alpacas

**Author's Note:**

  * For [blackandwhiteandrose](https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackandwhiteandrose/gifts).



> Based upon an idea we were throwing around in the Rose Apothecary a few weeks ago. I thought it would make a great conflict fic.

“David?”

“Welcome home, Patrick.”

“Honey, do the neighbors know that their animals escaped?”

“Abbott and Costello are safely in their paddock

“Then whose animals are in our yard?”

“Suprise!”

“David…”

“The brown one is Symphony and the cream one is Freesia.”

“Then who do Symphony and Freesia belong to?”

“Us!”

“You’re joking…”

“Remember how you said you wanted to get a pet?”

“I was thinking about adopting a dog.”

“Well, the neighbors popped by our store on your day off and asked if I could display a sign about rehoming a set of Alpacas. Their owner is relocating to Toronto for work and I offered to adopt them.”

“Shouldn’t you have asked me first?”

“I talked to Ted, he said that we had the perfect set up in the back yard for them.”

“Is Ted going to help us take care of them?”

“No.”

“David, you don’t like creatures that poop.”

“Look at how cute they are, Patrick!”

“I can’t believe you.”

“You love them, just admit it.”

"David, you can't just adopt a pair of alpacas because you feel like it."

“Are you upset?”

“I’m frustrated, David.”

“I’m sorry.”

“This is just a lot to process.”

“How so?”

“Do you think I expected to come home from work to a pair of Alpacas in our backyard.”

“No, but I thought you’d love the surprise.”

“David, I need to process this, to do some research.”

“I can help?”

“So you’ll feed them every morning and clean their pen and shear them.”

“I thought you’d do that.”

“I just need some time to…”

“To make spreadsheets?”

“Yes, to make spreadsheets, to do research, to figure out how I’m going to deal with the new additions to our family.”

“So we can keep them?”

“Maybe.”

“Patrick….”

“It’s not a no, but it’s not a yes.”

🦙 **A week later** 🦙

“I’m sorry, David.”

“Why?”

“I overreacted.”

“I should have talked to you before adding to our family.”

“I know you’re impulsive sometimes, David.”

“I need to think things through more.”

“Sometimes, but I’m kind of glad you didn’t this time.”

“Why?”

“I would have said no, and then done the research, and gotten stressed about having farm animals.”

“Do you want to rehome them?”

“This past week has been one of the best weeks of my life.”

“Really?”

“When I was growing up, I used to spend summers on my grandparents’ farm, helping with their goats and chickens every day. I didn’t realize how much I missed it.”

“So we can keep Symphony and Freesia?”

“Going out to take care of them every day has been a nice way to get going in the morning and to help wind down at night.”

“I’m loving them more than I thought.”

“You’re so good with them, so patient.”

“I do like brushing them.”

“I know you don’t want children, and up until you brought the alpacas home, I resented that a little bit.”

“Patrick, we can adopt if you really want to.”

“This isn’t the time for a discussion about human children. That’s something we need to both think long and hard about.”

“Okay.”

“Symphony and Freesia are like my children, our children. They’re part of our little family now.”

“You’re a great alpaca dad.”

“I mean we’ll have cute Christmas Cards this year. Happy Holidays from the Rose-Brewers, with a picture of us and our fuzzy children.”

“I’ll think about it.”

“Ray has already agreed to take the pictures.”

“Patrick!”

“I’m seeing a side of you I haven’t seen before. You’re so nurturing. For the first time in my life, I’m seeing you not be afraid to get messy, to help me feed them in the pouring rain.”

“Thanks, honey, I’ve never felt so paternal in my life.”

“It suits you well.”

🦙 **A year later** 🦙

“Need help?”

“I’m good, you’ve got some hay in your hair.”

“It looks like the girls were busy last night.”

“Dorothy, Rose, Blanche, and Sophia are handling the addition of Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, and Miranda to the coop quite nicely.”

“What about Alomar, Halliday, and Nikero?”

“You mean Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe? I’ll put them in the big coop soon, I want to let the old hens adjust a few chicks at a time.”

“You didn’t like my names for them?”

“They didn’t fit my aesthetic for the names.”

“Okay, they’re your responsibility so I shouldn’t complain.”

“Thanks, Patrick.”

“I can’t believe you’ve become a chicken lady.”

“Hush. How are Symphony and Freesia?”

“We’ll need to get them sheered soon.”

“I’ve already scheduled it.”

“Look at you David, on top of everything on the farm.”

“Is it a farm?”

“We’ve got alpacas, chickens, and the garden, I guess we can call it a farm.”

“Who’d have thought that we’d be selling products made with things we grew here at the Rose Apothecary?”

“I love it, David.”

“I do too, Patrick.”

🦙 **Five years later** 🦙

“Stel-la!”

“I still can’t believe I let you name our daughter that.”

“A Streetcar Named Desire is a classic, David.”

“I know the classics, but Mariah would have fit her better. She’s a little diva”

“Stella, who’s a good girl? Yes, you are!”

“Roll over Stella.”

“She’s finally listening to you.”

“Good dog.”

“It only took two years.”

“She’s stubborn.”

“You coddle her.”

“You’re the one who goes out before dawn to shovel snow for the Symphony and Freesia.”

“You’d do the same thing for the chickens.”

“That heater for their coop was a good investment.”

“I agree.”

“What would our life be like If I hadn’t adopted the alpacas?”

“Not as fun. I love this little farm.”

“I do too, Patrick. You’re a great farmer.”

“I try.”

“I’m glad you adopted Gretzky and Lemieux.”

“So you do like the cows?”

“Maybe.”

“So you’ll help me milk them then?”

“I could try if you wanted.”

“What’s gotten into you, David?”

“I mean it’s only fair, I should be getting my hands dirty as much as you do.”

“I’m glad you started our little farm.”

“I am too.”


End file.
